Suffering the Consequences

This growing up thing? It's hard. Hard on the control-freak parent who is trying to let go a little and give her daughter a bit more choice in life, but has a hard time when said daughter makes a choice that in the long run might not be the best one. It's hard on the parent who hates to sit by and watch the child suffer the consequences of a choice they made. It's hard on the parent who has this unexplained urge just to fix everything so that her daughter won't have to suffer at all, even though the parent knows deep down that by fixing everything the child will never learn and from her own mistakes/triumphs in life.

Undoubtedly, it's hard on the child who has to make these choices, be they good or bad, in order to learn from whatever may come as a result of these choices.

Today, I knowingly let Emily suffer whatever consequences may come as a result of her not turning in her reading log. She knew all week that it was supposed to be home, here for us fill out together, and, despite my constant reminders to her to bring it home, she still forgot it. I felt bad about it, so suggested that we do our own reading log, since we knew what the questions on it were, and, even though it would not be on the "official reading log paper", I am sure it will still count. The thing is, while I think it is important that she remember her "stuff," she actually has a problem with this kind of thing, more so than the usual kid. Sometimes, I need to cut her a little slack. Anyway, she refused to make up our own, and said outright, "I'll just get a zero." Me? I let it go at that. The hope is that when she gets a zero, or gets her report card she will see that her grade is a direct reflection of what she does or doesn't do all year,and that if her grade is lower than it may have otherwise been, she will make the connection. If I am being honest though? I don't have high hopes for this happening. Consequences have little effect on Emily, generally speaking any way. While the event is actually occurring (using this example when she gets her report card) she will be upset by it for that moment in time, but it will more than likely do little to deter the forgetting of the reading log in the future.

So, I guess we will just wait and see what happens, and hope for the best.